The gay male respondents became aware of their sadomasochistic preferences and had their first experiences at an older age. They showed a preference for leather outfits, anal intercourse, rimming, dildos, wrestling, special equipment and uniform scenes, and the straight male respondents for verbal humiliation, mask and blindfold, gags, rubber outfits, cane whipping, vaginal intercourse, cross dressing, and straitjackets, and different role plays except for uniform scenes.

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Four separate sexual themes were identified: Gay male participants showed a preference for hypermasculinity and straight men respondents for humiliation. The number of lesbian respondents was too low to draw any definite conclusions.

He had fun, the crowd had fun and he was just our local weirdo. So I thought. On tv we saw some more extravagant types. With feathers, in shows. Famous tv-hosts with faggy features, actors with more make-up than my mum and some other wild celebrities.


But they lived far away and we had nothing like that in our village. A club in the capital had opened and all celebrities were raving about the extravaganza going on there. Everybody wanted to hang out with the exotic gays. Documentaries explored the bright side of darkrooms.

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The images on tv sure did not make my family more openminded. And who cared anyway? In the meanwhile I was locked up in my closet. I did not recognize myself in the role models presented on tv.

But when I finally came out to my family and friends, a weird thing happened. I started to behave more gay than I was before.

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The extravagant gays from tv had become my unwanted role models and I did not know any better. Only since a year or two I know why I had to go through that phase. Almost three years ago I saw this video of Steve Grand and it made me feel uncomfortable.

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Even though I was happy to see a video with two guys being in love, I really had to get used to that. Years of Disney-and Hollywood indoctrination made it feel unnatural to see two guys holding hands. We are just not used to seeing that.

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Even to me it felt like there was so much lesbian and gay sex in that show. My brain primarily responds as: The ones that are not that extravagant.

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They are the guys and girls who fall in love, who comfort each other, who have sex, fight and have broken hearts. Exactly, those events with all the extravagant, pierced, slutty and excessive people.

Because without them, no one would even go on the streets. A parade with average and boring gays is totally not interesting. During a Pride Parade people dress up, just like with Halloween.